|
From the Desk of
Chad Allen
I have to say I was completely shocked at the level
of emotion of my own reaction. It's not that I didn't care, it's just that
I didn't know that I cared that much. But when I found out about it, I was
so full of joy and happiness and I was really emotional. I think that just
relays the sense that when you are denied something, at least for myself,
I tend to try and disregard its importance. And when all of a sudden it
happened, I realized there was a part of me that wanted it so desperately.
I think it's of massive importance for our
self-esteem and the personal level of acceptance that we all struggle for
as gay and lesbian people, for us to simply know that this part of our
dreams is even capable of coming true.
I'm thinking about getting married. I am in love with
my partner, deeply madly in love with him, and though I am not ready to
propose yet, it is in there. I have always said that I wasn't going to do
it until I could do it legally, and now that we can and it's real, there
is even a little bit of pressure now, like "I can't use that excuse
anymore." It's a kind of pressure that, say, my sister has always had
going into a relationship, wondering if this is the one and what about
popping the question, and when do you do it and how do you know. But I
have lived in ignorance of that until today.
 |